I was writing a poem listening to sounds of nature mixed with some Native American flute. The feeling of calmness is amazing. At that time I noticed on my footprints tracker here on Xanga. That someone was looking for the archives of May, 2005. Those posts are no longer visible for public. A new person will not even feel like I made posts in May, 2005. My curiosity took me to those archives and I got it. Yesterday when I posted my latest poem on Facebook which is of course is a link from here, I wrote this, “give me “All Of Your Luck” I need this more than anyone this week”. Okay, that was not exactly my words. It was taken from a comment written as a blessing for me for a post in May 2005. You know what I tried, I tried to visit the xanga site of the girl who wrote that. psssst I am still blocked from entering her xanga site. I don’t get angry these days.. still I have a question… What do you want from me? You don’t want to really talk to me, you don’t like me at all. Still you come here or some of your friends from California, Florida, Illinois, Michigan and Minnesota comes to my page and look for posts dating back to 2005. Tell me what do you want me to do? Last time you said something, you told not to try to communicate with you at all. I did exactly that. I never tried to communicate with you at all after that. But I have to ask. if you or your friends are reading this and want to read something specific from me. Ask me I will try to write it. I don’t know what it is. Don’t worry I am not going insane over this. Looks like there is something that is pushing you or your friends back to that point. I quoted you in that Facebook post because this week I need a lot of luck and that’s the best way to ask for it. If you can still wish it for me please go ahead I will appreciate it in the best possible ways. Look when people are friendly sometimes they may disagree and may not really talk to each other for a while. It will only help to understand each other better and be more friendly. Don’t think just because you told me not to communicate with you that I hate you. Don’t think just because I criticized some of your actions that I hate you. Don’t think all the weird things I told about your friends and your association with your friends makes me hate you. I like you in the same way I liked you in 2005.
Now to everyone else who read this, I stopped writing the poem at about half way through because anything I may write will reflect that past which I believe this girl don’t like me doing. Sorry everyone I may not be the best man around in looks, financial stability or position but I am just another human being. At least I have to take care of myself with respect. There is just a point to which I can take what hurts me, it is going a little beyond that now.
My Sincere Apologies to everyone.
Have a great day.
Lone.
Here is the sound file I was listening to.