Month: April 2013

There are many times I told about many poems I wrote. This is one poem I should not have written. I said the same thing in my mind the moment I finished writing this poem. I am trying my best to typecast myself to writing specific kinds of poems. My facebook friends abandoned the idea of following my poems. That’s their problem. No more 100s of views from there. No one told any reasons either.
Actually I should not have written this poem. I don’t know why. This kinda is the end of many thoughts that hit dead ends. I tried my best to find out a way to blame her for thoughts hitting dead ends. I cannot blame her at all. I cannot blame me either. I cannot blame the world and I cannot blame fate. What will be blamed for love filled thoughts hitting dead ends especially in my case. Hmmm I took the words ‘my’ and ‘I’ from the next thoughts that came to my mind and wrote this poem. When I finished it was a lot hard for me.
See that’s a good lesson for a young writer. You need to take an emotion and should make that emotion pain you from inside. Then release the thoughts and what comes out, will heal you and you will feel good. It looks like I may have to find other ways to feel good.

The Only Tear Drop.

The mind in disbelief to and fro ran,
As in the power of feelings even birds flew away,
Every beat of heart like thunder felt,
And soul with dark clouds filled.

The raised hands apart to ground fell,
Disbelief in mind joined the darkness in soul and became,
The despair that wanted to shout out loud,
The despair that wanted to cry like a newborn.

The chaos over, leaving eternal melancholy,
Oh’ in eagerness to see her eyes,
Eyes remained dry and fear in mind forgot to wake,
The spirit that drove life like an iceberg froze.

She walked like a dancer, talked like a singer,
And with her every smile a billion stars were born,
She the one who wrote the word of love in heart,
Now when standing with another man, erased it from heart.

No anger at her still came to heart,
For in the sleepless waiting for her, forgot
To be angry and learned to be kind,
But never learned to love another.

The tricky game of love life ended,
No blames, no arguments, just some dreams lost,
Time will not heal but will find other reasons to live,
But may only hold her as the reason for the loveless life.

Ah’ that thought spilled a drop of tear from eyes.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2013.

I am late by about 4 hours. I promised to post this poem by noon here to my facebook friends. Well I am going to be honest here. I woke up at 2:00PM and had breakfast. Watched birds feeding from the bird feeder I filled yesterday. Sipping in some green tea mixed with saffron and honey. I didn’t forget to post this. I just waited for this poem to settle in my own mind. Now I know it is well worth for many people to read this.

Enjoy.

A Smile From The Dirty Pond.

The clouds scattered and into deep sleep they fell,
As darkness wrapped around them like a magic spell,
Crooked minds found wicked gladness,
And their mind without even a blink of light, grown darker.

Silence became a myth mind never searched,
As between clouds twinkling stars I found,
Oh’ to many they are the lucky stars,
To others just blinkers in silence far, far away.

Looking at those stars many memories I can scavenge,
A smile or two some of those memories upon face may paint,
Most just blink like those stars and fade away,
Avoiding all distractions some sure will make me weep.

One memory where I heard no sounds at all,
And blind folded I chased and chased to hold it close,
Oh’ I chased and chased to know if it will make me weep,
Or will it make me smile, ah’ it chose to hide behind distractions.

Night have passed bright light filled mind too,
Shallow thoughts floated and became assumptions,
That bloomed like a lily in a pond with mud and dirt filled,
When holding the flower up from dirt I remembered.

The beautiful smile of her who always brought out the good of me.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2013.

The picture is of me and my good friend Mani. We first met when I was leaving India in 1998 and all these years we kept in touch. This picture was taken by Celine at Taylor’s Bar for their facebook page during our weekend outing in Downtown Milwaukee. It was a fun night and the fun this week starts on Wednesday.

 

It was an interesting night and it was an interesting day before that then there was an interesting night before that. Looks like I used the word ‘interesting’ too many times. After all that I came and sat with sleepy eyes to finish this poem. Some part of this poem are opinions of mine based on facts many people cannot understand or accept. They can do whatever they want. This is my poem love it or leave it or you can print it out and burn it.
Nothing more I can say about this poem as it explains what it is inside it.

A Soul On Fire.

Oh’ a new wave of thoughts I searched,
And none ever came to mind I can gather,
What blinded every sense of mine I inquired,
Ah’ the whispering witch from mind eloped.

Sun was kind, wind slowed, though mind faded,
The mind’s eyes from everything remain closed,
What cunning machinations out there I cared not,
How world moved no sense of mine know not.

Good thoughts, good dreams none I can find,
Nightmares and dirty thoughts I abandoned,
Oh’ all figures moving around in brutal reality,
Looked like tattoos on a whore who forever danced.

In them some with love smiled and whispered,
Poetry they hated without understanding a word,
Many others in strange reverie slept,
No thoughts about anything still mind not gathered.

The ways life stretched before me I will not take,
The ways others paved for me I will abandon,
No choice I will give life to bend me,
For my life cannot find meanings without me.

So cunningness of past, machinations of the future,
Blend and bend them all I will, for, none matters to me,
No thoughts from past will make me wish or will make me dream,
As the fires of soul blazed through every vein of mine.

The days of hibernation is over,
The fire melted and molded new thoughts,
And new dreams adorned those thoughts like diamonds,
Search is over but when looked in surprise I asked.

“Why none of the fires destroyed her face from my mind?”.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2013.

The pause is over, the Californian stalker I think left me for good. Well, like I said during a drive video I recorded earlier today. The blessing really came and for that, forever indebted I will be. 

This is the poem I was writing when this whole chaos came in. Like I always said, I am a very simple human being and I don’t even care a lot about reality of any given situation. I just love to make hypothetical scenarios with real people and make every poem I write give a feeling of absolute reality. It is the feeling I look for and most often I get it. There is only one fall out in this whole versifying circus. I was never able to earn the love I deserved. In fact, it is directly the opposite I got. Well, what can I say there is always a price to pay. I pray to God every day to make me live a thousand years if need be to feel one second of love of HER. That gave me a totally different thought what if this love is becoming a total curse for me or for her or for both of us. There the poem I started writing as a simple romantic poem ended with the old thought resurfacing as Faded Harmony.

Enjoy.

Faded Harmony.

Chords in guitar slowly strummed,
As words in mind into verses weaved,
There was a dream from where all triggered,
Romantic feelings filled us both in perfect harmony.

Drawing all energy for each other sworn,
Life with sanctity of love in beautiful souls,
Ah’ Mother Nature blended her sound with us,
As all moved along as if in a harmonious dance.

Love gave us the feelings of togetherness,
Love gave us the chance to blend two lives into one,
Ah’ stubbornness took away the pleasure of togetherness,
Anger and ego consumed passions in veins for each other.

Look around you, feel the touch of nature upon you,
The air that caress you, the scent of blooms that adore you,
The bird that imitates you, the sound of rain that makes you dance,
Ah’ in it all the lover in me hid the fulfillment of every dream of yours.

Through the deceptive games of mine faded,
The harmony between our hearts like the fallen leaves of Fall,
But they will feed new passions when you will feel the sprouts of love,
Love regenerated from the harmony we once adored, as friends and lovers.

Every new hope weaves a new dream,
The old harmony though faded still kindles a dream,
In every thought ah’ a prayer for you and me I always prayed.
Never to make a curse of our lives in the feelings of love we once felt.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2013.

I was writing a poem listening to sounds of nature mixed with some Native American flute. The feeling of calmness is amazing. At that time I noticed on my footprints tracker here on Xanga. That someone was looking for the archives of May, 2005. Those posts are no longer visible for public. A new person will not even feel like I made posts in May, 2005. My curiosity took me to those archives and I got it. Yesterday when I posted my latest poem on Facebook which is of course is a link from here, I wrote this, “give me “All Of Your Luck” I need this more than anyone this week”. Okay, that was not exactly my words. It was taken from a comment written as a blessing for me for a post in May 2005. You know what I tried, I tried to visit the xanga site of the girl who wrote that. psssst I am still blocked from entering her xanga site. I don’t get angry these days.. still I have a question… What do you want from me? You don’t want to really talk to me, you don’t like me at all. Still you come here or some of your friends from California, Florida, Illinois, Michigan and Minnesota comes to my page and look for posts dating back to 2005. Tell me what do you want me to do? Last time you said something, you told not to try to communicate with you at all. I did exactly that. I never tried to communicate with you at all after that. But I have to ask. if you or your friends are reading this and want to read something specific from me. Ask me I will try to write it. I don’t know what it is. Don’t worry I am not going insane over this. Looks like there is something that is pushing you or your friends back to that point. I quoted you in that Facebook post because this week I need a lot of luck and that’s the best way to ask for it. If you can still wish it for me please go ahead I will appreciate it in the best possible ways. Look when people are friendly sometimes they may disagree and may not really talk to each other for a while. It will only help to understand each other better and be more friendly. Don’t think just because you told me not to communicate with you that I hate you. Don’t think just because I criticized some of your actions that I hate you. Don’t think all the weird things I told about your friends and your association with your friends makes me hate you. I like you in the same way I liked you in 2005.
    Now to everyone else who read this, I stopped writing the poem at about half way through because anything I may write will reflect that past which I believe this girl don’t like me doing. Sorry everyone I may not be the best man around in looks, financial stability or position but I am just another human being. At least I have to take care of myself with respect. There is just a point to which I can take what hurts me, it is going a little beyond that now.

My Sincere Apologies to everyone.
Have a great day.
Lone.

Here is the sound file I was listening to.

 

You know you are a good writer when a reader reads your work and feels as if you are writing your personal experience. No other art can bring that feeling other than poetry. Argue with me I will beat you now, I will beat you tomorrow and I will beat you in that argument till the end of time. Poetry cannot be packaged into a commercial product so most of the business minded people hates poets. I know many who hates me just because I write poetry.That’s their problem.

Just draining my mind here that’s all.

About this poem. When someone first see a beautiful girl and feel attracted to that girl there is that feeling that comes into one’s mind. It happens every day to everyone. Otherwise call yourself a rock and sit on top of a hill forever. When it happens to me. I sometimes go to the girl and tell her what I feel. Those words that were spoken, 99.99% of times I won’t remember at all to write down as poems, as the reactions and escapes from that area erases everything about what I thought and spoke. Many times I don’t say it. Those are the ones that comes out here as poems. hehehehe.. I think you folks got my point. This yet another one.

A New Smile.

Watched sunlight from eastern skies sprouting
Setting fires to the clouds all around trapped,
The melted mist from newborn leaves dripped,
Ah’ peace of morning like the love in your eyes felt.

Many poets before me through ages praised,
Your beauty, many as classic poems learned,
And even beyond time will echo those sounds
That defines your beauty in souls eternally.

One more line I don’t want to write,
Praising your beauty around your soul wrapped,
Reflections of morning through my five senses unite,
And wrapped me in a cloak of new life of love.

Oh’ my heart in a different rhythm beat,
As love is sprouting in my heart like spring blossoms,
May the warmth of your love make them colorful flowers,
I will give those flowers for you to decorate your prettiness.

At the lady of the reason of my reverie once more I looked,
Feeling past like the winter cold, ice and snow erased,
And deep into heart a new face and new feelings embedded,
Then unintentionally aloud with a new smile I said,

“Oh’ what a wonderful feeling love is.”.

 ©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2013.

This is my T.V bringing the series on HBO Game Of Thrones wow this is awesome.. I ‘Whatsaap’ed my friend “This is LOTR on Steroids.”.

I like what I wrote. I’d love to make this a reality. Pray for me or wish me all of your luck in making this a reality..

The Tired Storyteller.

The ways of life so wonderfully planned,
And through fulfillment of dreams so well written
Life of many goes through discipline drawn,
By passionless freaks, ah’ interpreters of life.

A system of combinations,
Combinations of many permutations,
All well drawn angles and perfected equations.
Math only half-understood by a handful nerds.

No equations can solve the math in her mind,
No combinations can unfold the puzzle of who she is,
Ah’ in a whirlpool of silence with eyes shut she fell,
Then stretched a hand for help opposite to mine.

And throwing every wish of mine into that whirlpool,
My mind, my life and my dreams to new paths directed.
Never can I look back as even the prettiest girl’s shadow,
Will be dark even in the brightest sunny day.

A story ended, storyteller tired,
The new paths directed to a desolate desert,
Somewhere will be pretty mirages,
Somewhere will be a life stretching oasis.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2013.

Just Read!!

A Bitch.

Happy hour poured through bottles and took,
Many minds away from many pains of life,
Intoxication through veins raced
And the illogical subconscious spoke aloud.

Sitting at the bar and at all these drunks smiled,
Like an insane soul who don’t need no alcohol,
To be intoxicated to take mind away from world,
As life into me poured events that intoxicated me.

In the sudden rain that lashed all around,
With thunder and lighting in fury threatened,
Everyone out of all intoxication and think right,
Many then understood the good old monster, reality.

When walking out into the rain I smiled,
With a thought how wonderfully I eluded,
The pain and the pathetic artificiality,
Oh’ life is a bitch who gives me happy hour every hour.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2013.

 

This poem came out of a conversation with my brother. I told him about some weird dreams I have seen recently. They made no sense at all. At that time my brother said. Those dreams are just junk thoughts my mind want to get rid off. After that I thought is there any thought I can get rid off. Automatically I thought about a girl in my mind and I smiled and said the last but one line of this poem. Enjoy Sunday.

Writing A Dream.

Said to my mind about a beauty who conquered,
My soul and from my mind and life erased,
Every dream and every bit of life lived till that day,
And with a little smile my mind listened.

“Such is the tenderness of her beauty,
Love will be a perfect ornament upon her I can place,
And every smile of her added more ornaments,
And rich in my mind she became.”

Thoughts about that beauty became wonderful friends,
Who all sang me to sleep every night,
And woke me with their soft hands touching my eyes,
Ah’ they never said anything cross to me ever.

Words about that beauty every day line by line I wrote,
And kept under the pillow upon which I slept,
They all united in my subconscious as wonderful dreams,
Ah’ every known moments of my life I want, to be a blessing for her.

Last line I wrote knowing I just wrote the only dream in my life.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2013.