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I am going through this incredible phase of my life trying hard to convince myself and people who cares, how simple minded I am. The problem is the world around is too complicated to understand someone who cares more spiritually than materially.

     A new set of poems are near completion so in the coming months you all will be able to see those poems here. That is another confusion in mind as the kind of style I write must change. From romantic poems to epic style is not an easy transformation. I may very well be booed by all when the first two three poems comes out. But hold your breath they are coming.

   Now this poem, last night I was watching REVERENDB show on blogtv after finishing my show. At that time I was browsing through some of my scribbles and found a line, the last line of the poem. Rather than writing from top to bottom this is a poem worked from bottom to top. The situation is very real. The lines that says about walking and running laughing are an adaption of a event I saw in a Malayalam T.V serial.

 

Enjoy the poem.

 

A Repenting Lover.

 

In a night with storms that sway,

Even stars that are far away,

Lightning in rhythms of thunders danced,

And all around the silent lands crashed.

 

You took hands of night and danced,

And spread the dark all around,

You made pain from every step you laid,

And into a soul whispered, loveless sonnets.

 

Ah’ why through those paths you ventured,

Why washed away the graffiti that symbolized,

What in the depths of heart felt, and conveyed?

And through a prism looked into dark skies for love?

 

Owls and bats at the first light back to their nests went,

There is nothing to express pain filled expressions to,

Rain washed away dirt from material existence,

The new born sun dried wet lands faster in kindness.

 

A thousand times to forgive you I prayed,

And any wrong thoughts from your heart faded away,

In laughs that echoed through the plains I walked,

Then ran as fast as I could from oneself to escape,

As none can shed a tear in forgiveness of my unaccepted love.

 

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM All Rights Reserved 2010

 

I started writing a new set of poems and oh my god, the theme away from Romance and Love seems to be hard to take. I wrote, rewrote and then thrown away all that I wrote now restarting in a new way. It is not easy to change styles which I learned in a hard way now. But I guess I will be able to adapt myself to a more narrative style in time. I am not able to focus a lot into writing as lot of other things with life kinda holds me by my throat. Well, I’ve been here before so I will get along with things. I guess everyone is okay out there. I thought this winter I may have another explosion with my poetry in new style, I promised my hard core readers that the new poems will come two weeks back. I am sorry folks this poet failed miserably in what he promised. But here is something I did with a bunch of pictures I got from couple sites. I made a video of my poem “The Essence Of A Lover’s Life”. Hope you all like it. It was made mostly for people who follow me on facebook and Youtube. But my xanga family, I can’t keep it only for them you are all always here with me, with love, with care and a lot of prayers. I love you all.

By the way my xanga friends who use facebook become a fan of me there http://facebook.lonelypoet.com my fan page cannot add you directly back as a friend. You become a fan of me in that link I will add you from the parent ID which is Sajumon Ashan. Those who use Youtube please subscribe to me there http://youtube.lonelypoet.com

You all enjoy what remains of the winter. The next Arctic blast is on its way to midwest…mmm I loving this cold..woo hoo.

Here is the video presentation of my poem Nursery Of Starts.

Happy Valentine’s Day Everyone.

Hi All,

   It was a week that put me in a drum and thrown me downhill. That’s what happens if one expects things to happen in a specific way and everything pauses. By Thursday I’ve thrown out all my expectations. Nothing much happened different. It helped me to get out of the drum and walk away.

  Terrible things happens around the world. One don’t need to speak about all of it as everyone is watching it all on T.V. Equally wonderful things happens in the world too. One need to be good investigative journalist to know those wonderful things. Looks like our T.V stations and media are making us addicted to calamities. But no matter what happens… it is better to smile and say “That what exactly we have at this point of time”

  I am a poet, people expect poetry in these posts.. hmmm sure new poetry will come next week.

  Here are some images that held my breath, made me smile, some just squeezed me from inside and some just shown me how lucky we are all.

A looter leaves a damaged building through a hole in a wall in downtown Port-au-Prince January 29, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Carlos Barria

A martial arts performer wearing a tiger-like costume wrestles with a cow during a show called “oriental bullfighting” to celebrate the upcoming Chinese New Year in Jiaxing, Zhejiang province January 29, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Stringer

Newly raised recruits from first women battalion of Indo-Tibetan Border Police (ITBP) adjust their caps before a group photo after their passing out parade in an ITBP training centre at Bhanu in the northern Indian state of Haryana January 29, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Ajay Verma

A U.N. police officer unties the hands of a boy who took part in looting in downtown Port-au-Prince January 29, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/St Felix
Evens

A Palestinian girl is lowered from a window after tear gas entered the house during a protest in the West Bank village of Nabi Saleh near Ramallah January 29, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Ammar Awad

A man protests during a march in Mexico City January 29, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Daniel Aguilar

Musician Jason Mraz attends the 2010 MusiCares Person of the Year Tribute to Neil Young in Los Angeles January 29, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Phil McCarten

A pygmy hippopotamus (Choeropsis liberiensi) opens its mouth as it waits to be fed inside its enclosure at the Singapore Zoo January 29, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Tim Chong

A demonstrator wearing a mask of Britain’s former Prime Minister Tony Blair, waves red stained hands through the bars of a makeshift jail during a protest outside the Iraq Inquiry, in London, January 29, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Luke Macgregor

What is going on in the world? I am not expecting answers that tells me the truth from anyone. I am not saying all are lying. What I am saying is people either don’t know the truth or don’t believe in the truth. There are people who believe they and some of their friends can achieve whatever they want in this universe, just because they believe, they have the talent to do it. Watch this video

Now I believe they know what I am talking about, how insignificant we are in this universe. In fact we know nothing about the universe in the first place, we don’t know what time is it even. So without knowing many just assume they know everything or start believing in space, time and dimensions.  
       Most of you maybe wondering where I am going with this post! Relax, you will see.
                When one look at the massive amount of time that passed us by one will think, “oh my god, are we at the end of it all” once more … Relax.. Don’t be stupid. Nothing is ending anywhere. Life as is may not exist. Life will come in another form in another way. I don’t believe in reincarnation, that is bullshit spread by Eastern ideology. My point is, life as we know is only a short amount of time and in this given time one should not waste even a bit of it.  There are other people I know who waste more time just wasting time than live it. It is like a straight person going to a gay club looking for fun. Just face the reality that came from the past and understand, there are hundreds of different ways one can live but your way was shown by days when you took the first steps of life. That’s the truth. However you always have a choice of believing in the truth or walking away from the truth.  
           Away from the thoughts I wrote above… Watch the video, if someone read my profile, in it one can see in the expertise part I said, “Making myself believe that I am mircro microscopic in this vast expanding universe.” I wrote that nearly 5 years ago. I don’t needed radio or infrared or space based telescopes or spend sleepless hours wrecking my head on the wall writing algebra all around the floor and ceiling to understand that. Just needed to look in the past. Like I said to the mother of my friend, “She can learn from the wisdom of past or from her own mistakes”. It just that… most of the people understood me wrong. Maybe some people will tell I am self boasting, ahahaha no I am not, just letting you know that, you and everyone who reads this can be far better than I am. The key is in the past, you need to look at it with an open mind. 
              Have a fantastic weekend everyone… mmm isn’t that predicting the future? naaa it is a wish and a prayer to God to make it happen to everyone who reads this and sent a smile upon the face of all of them.   

Hello guys, girls, aliens, how are you all doing?
  . There are a lot of things happening all around me. You know what, I don’t care until the sky falls on my head. I am sorry BlogTV guys, last night the dinner went for too long I just wasn’t able to get back in time. Plus two of my friends started fighting online. Last night the dinner was fantastic, my cousin’s son who came from India took me and my brother’s family for a dinner. We went to this Thai restaurant.. woo, awesome. It is in Overland Park, KS, called Thai Place. Even though I have a lot of disagreements about the Thai society as is, their food is awesome. Like I said earlier I just didn’t do anything other than just dropping my cousin’s son at the airport today. But when reading the news at Reuters.Com I found these impressive images that kinda gives a flow of the events that’s going on around the world. Enjoy.

A snow man that was built as part of a climate change awareness program stands near the Berlin Cathedral (Berliner Dom) in Berlin early January 20, 2010. Environmental activist are calling on Berliners this weekend to build snowman in a bid to form a “Snowman Demonstration” in the heart of the German capital to raise awareness for climate change. Credit: REUTERS/Thomas Peter

A man passes a sign stuck to a wall in London January 20, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Stefan Wermuth

A model presents a creation by Penkov at the Berlin Fashion Week Fall/Winter 2010/11 in Berlin January 20, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Fabrizio Bensch

An Afghan man walks on the street as the sun sets at Delaram district in Nimroz province, southern Afghanistan January 20, 2010.
Credit: REUTERS/Marko Djurica

Children dressed as soldiers perform during the traditional festival of Tamborrada in San Sebastian January 20, 2010. The Tamborrada commemorates the Napoleonic occupation of the city and thousands of children and adults play drums and barrels for 24 hours around the city during the festival.
Credit: REUTERS/Vincent West

Yuko Kavaguti and Alexander Smirnov of Russia perform during the pairs free program at the European Figure Skating Championships in Tallinn January 20, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Grigory Dukor

And last but not least it is me in a Thai restaurant last night with my brother and his family.

Hello everyone. How are you all doing these days? I am so sorry I am not coming to Xanga much these days. Got some work to be done, plus, I am working on some new poems which are not done yet. I am posting a poem here, I didn’t write this poem. The author of the poem is one of my best friends from India. He wrote the poem back in 2000 August. He recently asked me if I can find this poem for him. Here is the request I received on Facebook.
“Nice to hear your Castle in seconds ! If you still have my old poem, could you please send it to me .. read it on your blogTV ? It was nice to see and hear you after long.”
 Actually it took a wild ride for me to go an find that poem as I lost the original emails when my computer crashed back in 2007. But luck was with me and Benji, I found the poem in archive.org as I have posted the poem in LonelyPoet.Com in 2000. I am posting the poem as well as the email I received at that time here. It is good for a laugh. Keep in mind Benji is now married with two children. We talked about this poem last night on skype and had a long laugh. Hope you all enjoy this.

“Dear Riaz,
Was going through a troubling period in my life. Wrote a poem in the pangs of despair. I am sure you will identify with the emotions. Hope you like it. Please add it to lonelypoet.com as a work by a lonely friend of the lonelypoet
love
Benji

In the deep recess of the heart,
A Temple is desolate, empty and bare.
Its corridors echo a deafening silence.
For a Goddess has left it behind.

Outside, in the wilderness around,
A Priest lies with his face to the ground.
With a forlorn gaze on some distant mirage.
Benumbed, caught in a death-like vise.

He had been out, trying the best he could,
To build a Temple, magnificent, as befitted her.
Waiting without hope, she deemed him fickle,
And decided to leave, for another, better still.

Alas ! It was doomed from the start.
Arrogantly, he had professed his faith.
The journey was over, even before the start.
So sudden was the fall from grace.

Fate, Thou art cruel yet kind.
A new Goddess appears on the horizon.
She waits to be deified in his heart.
And prays for a devotion that will last.

Can he forget ? Can he be true ?
Will there be an answer to his cries ?
Confused and sad, he looks towards the stars.
Dare he believe, that there be one, lovelier still ?
—— Benji (’73- ?)
Written for those who know and care enough to understand. 21st August 2000 A.D. “

I probably will do a BlogTV show late tonight. Well that is still not sure as I got a dinner then got to meet couple of others. My BlogTV friends, please excuse me for not doing show there.

NFL playoffs are keeping me glued to the T.V.  These are fun days and I don’t really move much from the couch. In between when I look on some of the news channels, Oh God what I see is the heart wrenching scenes from Haiti. No words can describe tragedy and disaster and the pain that comes out of it all. Anything anyone can do please do it.
  As for poetry, here is a news. I am working on some folk stories from different parts of the world to write poems about them. So I don’t have a new poem here today and maybe for some more days. Love poems? naaa That era is over. Maybe someone, someday will inspire me again to write Love poems again. But let me tell ya… Hope is a cancer that will never go to remission for me.

Here are some pictures.

He Pingping (L) of China holds the finger of Sultan Kosen of Turkey as they pose for photographers during a promotional event in Istanbul January 14, 2010. He, with a height of 73 cm (2 feet 5 inch), and Kosen, with a height of 246.5 cm (8 feet 1 inch), are listed in the Guinness World Records as the world’s shortest man and tallest man respectively. Credit: REUTERS/Osman Orsal

A injured child receives medical treatment after an earthquake in Port-au-Prince January 13, 2010. Credit: REUTERS/Eduardo Munoz

Auto show workers climb down ladders after working on a Dodge Ram truck that is attached to the ceiling upside down as part of the Chrysler display during press days of the 2010 North American International Auto Show at Cobo Center in Detroit, Michigan January 11, 2010.
Credit: REUTERS/Rebecca Cook

A hippopotamus called Nikica drinks water from the swimming pool in the centre of the Plavnica hotel complex, some 17km south of Podgorica January 13, 2010. Montenegro’s only hippopotamus escaped from the mountainous Adriatic nation’s zoo during floods this week, officials said on Wednesday. In its native Africa, the world’s third largest mammal on land is considered aggressive and dangerous. But zoo owner Nikola Pejovic said Nikica was not a threat to people. Credit: REUTERS/Stevo Vasiljevic

Enjoy the long weekend everyone.
May God Smile Upon You All Always.