By William Wordsworth Composed 1804.—Published 1842
The peace which others seek they find; The heaviest storms not longest last; Heaven grants even to the guiltiest mind An amnesty for what is past; When will my sentence be reversed? I only pray to know the worst; And wish as if my heart would burst.
O weary struggle! silent years Tell seemingly no doubtful tale; And yet they leave it short, and fears And hopes are strong and will prevail. My calmest faith escapes not pain; And, feeling that the hope is vain, I think that she will come again.
Across at the galloping waves motherly eyes looked, As wave after wave failed on the shores of westend lands, Deep in her mind a grain of sadness came and sang, About the pain of a mother who can’t see her only child.
He left the land to sea one dawn, not in anger or sadness, But for the passion of life not felt in his long life as unknown. The creeks of the wood annoyed, the splash of the sea scared, The whirling of the wind to his heart spoke in verses unheard.
Nautical miles pushed him ahead and behind fell, As many lands, seas, mountains and seasons he passed, Still when in the corner of the deck he stood he felt home, Home and a heart of a mother uninterruptedly beats in prayers.
Still in the world of unknowns his life he lived, Scribbling images in words of things the world seen, The unusual he expected not, what felt new made him glad, Then his mind he took off the deck and the sea to a tale.
A tale he wrote about the land where no mountains stood, Where grass grown high and in the winds from all sides waved, Like the waves that carried him for a long upon rough seas, Where the air warm but not hot, cool but not cold, flew.
In the story he wrote he told about a lady he heard, Who woke up every day and sat on bed and prayed, For the good of her, good of all who loved her, and peace, As if her prayers went unanswered into her life a man came.
Man from the foreign lands, who spoke and acted, Anything and everything other than the ways she knew, But the kind hearted girl, Oh’ soft to him she spoke, And the love he kindled many times she blew off.
With his love filled ways through life wandered, Every memory of her erased the sadness he felt, And the gladness that came made him smile, Tragic he never felt as love in him never died.
Traveler about their love day and night wrote, Their speech and act in many ways enacted, Oh’ mind a fantastic stage of many acts became, And every possible ways of their union he wrote.
As about the land they lived he described, The land by the water ways and many lakes, Where four seasons birthed and died perfectly, Where world united as one in celebrations.
And a day came when far away in a land unknown, The ship through sea-like lakes into inlands passed, When they stopped the traveler stood on deck amazed, As all that in his inward eyes he saw, now in real stood.
He questioned himself in soliloquy, “Am I a myth maker?”, None answered as alone into the busy towns he ventured, Sitting by the lake he drew the couple of his love story, Then to many he queried if they know either one of them.
Every answer of ‘No’ in disappointments he took, And in the morning of the day of his embarkment, Alone by that lake he stood still in amazement, Then from behind a soft voice to him asked,
“Am I the one you are looking for?” and he turned, To his amazement he saw an old lady but still charming, Held his hand and asked if they ever met, He answered and explained the story in wicked mind wrote,
She laughed and asked to show the image of his creation, When she saw the man she stood up all stunned and said, “I knew that man whom I met in my mid-twenties, A man of words like you who wrote and wrote poetry,
About the love he may get from me and his love for me, No man I knew loved like him who loved me in all sincerity, But in my heart I never had any love for him so I denied, And even in disappointment he loved me more and more”.
She smiled and continued “I left this town and left him alone, How long I read his words I can’t say, but one day all stopped, The man I loved betrayed me and I left him in disappointment, Then I searched and searched for the versifier for many years.
No sign I found and nothing I heard and about you I heard, My heart thrived to know if it is him who came for me, And once more now I know the pain of disappointment, As I loved the man who loved, now gone from all knowledge.”.
For a long time they both sat and about the man they spoke, The traveler left the lady and through waters he left, Seas he passed and oceans once more welcomed his sight, Far away to his homeland he reached to a motherly happy tear.
To his mother he read the story he wrote and the reality, A mother in tears at the drawings of the young couple looked, She said “The tragedies of the world you saw and beauty Of love you have known, now live in peace of home.”.
When resting out into the sea he looked astonished, Peace indeed he found at home but they he thought, About the man who loved in every disappointments. The lady and never felt the love her in real.
Somewhere in the depth of his mind a feeling he felt, That love transcended distances and world and reached, The soul of that man who from far may have inspired, Him to be the Myth Maker from his travels he became.
By the sun, moon, planets and stars I swear, I don’t want to feel the love of anyone else but you, So when I talk to girls, rough I speak, arrogant I act, Leaving no sign of a dream in their minds about me.
By the graves of my ancestors to the world I swear, Not to seek the feel of the comforts of this world, For in spirit the love of the divine constantly I feel, And the love on Earth that divine love shown, You.
By the beats of my heart that keeps me alive I swear, Loneliness never will fill my heart as my heart is full, Of dreams and thoughts about you, that fuels me to smile, Smile at the agonies, life and world at me may throw.
By the love in my heart I ever felt I swear, Every bit of your life, given by life, I will celebrate, Be it the sadness or anger, I will whisper a verse, To bring a smile in your soul and erase the aches.
Oh’ as the shines of this day to eternal past leaves, Every bit of life shuts down to rest and recuperate, I remembered all my vows as my mind I left to sleep, Oh’ but my love sworn, to be awake, loving you.
Dewdrops in the warmth left by the morning sun vanished, Reimmigrated birds honed their tunes in rigorous practice, Oh’ senses scanned all around for a reason to be unhappy, Back to the half nap, I fell as heartbeat found a new melody.
Soliloquist abandoned conscience and mind away from stage sat, When walking around I hunted the soliloquist and asked, What makes you contented? What brings you peace? And conscience told, repetition refined the negative into a pulse.
Pulse that fueled the fascinations of a fantastic fantasy, In which we grew a garden of Earthly heaven where, All elements of life united and then a touch of soul, Brought in by the senses of you and the one you love.
I left conscience somewhere near the moving stairs, Even when I crossed the river and drove fast I felt, The celebration of a myth I carried all through my life, That none out there can figure a way to love me.
Oh’ many humorous insults about myself I told, And to each joke in many different tones, I laughed, Some I even gave a name and color for me to repeat. Each laugh louder than before, deep in me left an aching scar.
Sleepless nights he spent in searching for new ways, To deepen the warmth he feels when about her he thinks, But through the roofless sky love flies to unknown planets, The loser takes all blames and there are no winners.
Love the emotion from close to the part of sanity comes, And that thin line stays bright lit between sanity and insanity, Love touched him, love touched her but their sanity, Ah’ a wonderful myth that darts through that bright thin line.
The destruction of choices in and out of love was complete, When to her his likes he told and her dislikes he had known, Then fantasies beyond the worlds of fancy imaginations, erupted, Ah’, only through guesses from her gestures her love known.
Assumptions and gossips like redwoods without humans grown, The evolution of his love ah’ all alone like wildfire spread, Dreams shattered as silence became a darkness and erased, Hopes from every pixel of a dream that played a happy smile.
Words from him poured, only in writing, her world quieted, No assumptions, no gossips ever explained reasons, Oh, no reason ever given for the existence of anything, Still in truth and false defined they live, laugh, and cry.
In the boisterous laughs and sobbing ah’ drops of tears shed, Inside every fallen drops were the meaning of her to him, And what felt inside him when those tears were shed, Defined every bit of the truth of her love so silently she kept.
The day left me nothing worthwhile to remember, The chants of the evening into depths of soul grown, Loving her never will become a routine for me to do, But all chants senses feel, every evening, are for her.
The chants of this day were so different than every day, As those were a story about a man who emptied his heart.
“Beyond the decade of the second millennium he took, A barren heart across the plains of the American heart, In his heart no wishes remained, no pain to ache, As once more the love he searched for was unfound, Realities disconnected, broken heart barren became, Oh’ through the frozen paths to the dairy land he drove, To find heart beats he lost to arrogance filled sorrow.
Hopes he gathered and into the waves of the lake left, Oh’ they unfurled and into the depths drowned fast, Then when around the ghetto he wandered he felt, The pulsation of a feeling he once into waves drowned, Ah’ where love sprouted he knew not but fast it spread, Through his veins and romance built a fortress inside. Though disappointments became synonyms of day-to-day fate, Lady who took his barren heart and gave hopes on hopes, Stalked his heart through the language of hearts he spoke.
Mysteries and fables of modern days in his heart birthed, Through ways of his own invention through logic he erased, Then one day, a fear in the corner of his heart he felt, That fear spoke nothing, left no trace for any logic, That fear sprouted in her heart about the love he felt, Her love churned and churned in gossips and fables, Of jealous minds with friendly smiles like parasites clutched, Then love lost, only fear remained and that fear spread, Oh’ through his heart, and his love, and his senses.
Once more beside the lake through falling snow he walked, In every step he left a bit of heart inside him he felt, Heart is gone only pieces of flesh beat to keep him alive, The emptied heart froze under the layers of snow and ice.”.
Seasons may change, every bit of life age may grab, He thought and made fables of his own to smile and laugh. One of the nightly fables he made after seeing the sprouts, Of tulips, he left in the previous fall now waving at him and smiles, Oh,’ that fable kept him away from the lake that unfroze, In the spreading warmth of the new birthed spring.
When love I felt clung to my heart I asked, My conscience to search past and present of life, For a heart where my dreams of love can rest, And silence into my inner thoughts spread, Like darkness of the night into a mountain.
When scouring through the past and present, known, Ah’ about the hearts I have known with love, And through love that build in my heart step by step, The wrongs of the night no days ever seen, The wrongs of the days, ah’ in overwhelming light buried, Light everyone misunderstood as the love of mine.
When in the villainy of the wild world one consumes, Always comes the consequences that make one cry, Ah’ I challenged life to bring on all those consequences, As learned I to drown every pain any hurt can bring, But never ever even in imagination to me whispered, Silence will hunt me to a sleepless self-talker, As my own conscience into darkness hid from my stalking.
Through the country-side and through towns life wandered, Milestones passed and many shores erased left footsteps, Sun and Moon competed to see misfortunes of romance, Then they too hid behind dark clouds as shadows fainted, Shadows like blessings angels all through life followed. Now as realities deferred to be real and faded into fog, Oh’ fate ran out of space and time for me to be a lover, Still, when thinking about your smiling images, I smile, The kind soul of yours makes a heart where dreams can rest.
One bright day to the world around Nature gave, The warmth flew with the wind, danced, and sang, For the cocoons upon the naked branches sticking, Time stood by for them to grow and transform, The pain of the sprouting wings frowned time, As they broke through the cocoons and flew, Into warmth and through the wind, time unpaused.
Ah’ that flight brought pride to the whole nature, And spread gladness in every loving mind who all felt, Wings sprouted for the love to reach their Love, colorfully.
Brightness always traveled around or into every heart reached, Equally, as abandoned lovers felt frozen in the maze of sorrow. Oh’ a shadow always lurked behind the souls of the unloved, Part their heart where love of their loved ones should brighten, Ah’ darkness fills unchecked like a monster from another world. No taste touches mouths, no flower gives scents, no color shown, Loveless life loses meanings written, abandoned man feels inhuman.
Time tuned a song for a lover to sing in his heart’s rhythm, No meaningful words found as his story none ever cared, For none cared to define meanings of the love of a lonely.
Then a meaning echoed none ever thought will be heard, A title it took that told the world the meaning of the event, In common tongue it meant “The Lady Who Looked Back.”. She the one who split light into seven and warmed horizons, Those seven colors to touch her and feel her, Oh they fought, And at those colors and rays that galloped and shattered, She looked and she knew they carry a love that hunts her.
The love of the past, perfected into the love of present, hunts, Ah’ along with the warmth of the seasons to every corner spreads, The pride of the present to carry her beauty and love to the future. Ah’ ageless love surrounded her that she felt and she looked back. One less man in the group of men abandoned by their lovers.
Oh’ I left all questions inside a mosque, And through asphalt darkness I drove, The past I left within those bended questions, The future approached fast same as I approached.
Far, far away, Oh’ saintly hands blessed, Gathered the knowledge, gained understandings, Ran through time, when every one walked, Followed none, followed by none, alone I prayed.
And far away from that reality I came, A thousand fantastic fantasies followed and wrapped, Life in colors and glitter, sounds and rhythms, Carried falls from the other side of world under my feet.
Empty hands, hungry heart, pathetic fate, colorless dreams, Life from under the feet fell beyond tears of hopes, When faces turned red, Oh’ love turned sweet grapes to sour, And smile from a face with love I looked, erased.
Who achieved what? Who lost? Who gained? When you turned your face away from me did you see, Another dream inside your mind flowering? Or did you hide a drop of tear in your love for me?
A drop of tear with a material reality you can never show, Or did you thought I find happiness in pain and ache, Taken from losing my love again and again in unattainable love? Oh’ I left all questions inside a mosque when inside I felt your love.
The evening sacrificed the day and left to bleed, And the horizons took the colors of that brutality, And beyond minds can imagine in patterns spread, Why evening did such an act to many unknown, Some painted, some danced, some sang, and some wrote, Every soul a meaning took as for humanity dusk sacrificed, Ah’ my meanings took face of yours my dearest, my darling.
The spreading night into every life forcefully unleashed, Darkness, from where birthed illusions of monstrosity, But the different meanings humanity took from the sacrifice, Of the evening that painted the horizons and charmed, Took a meaning of its own to keep minds away from illusions, And in every moment of the derived meaning a story born, Oh’ my story told about the romance of mine with you dear.
The misunderstood, betrayed, and mocked, scavenged, In the dark of the dark for the ray of hope, Ah’ even when the swords of the sun avenged the brutality, Of the evening with his own magical battle and painted, Horizons with stories of melancholy and victories of humanity, Those lost souls, blinded by hopeless faith heckled their minds, Ah’ my soul never saw the dark as your face filled me.
The mornings, noons, evenings and nights clashed, None of those my heart in anyway could care, The world into race, cultures, religions, and class divided, And clashed and killed and mutilated the sanctity of humanity, The heavens exploded and clashed into dust and rebirthed, In mysterious ways mankind with five senses cannot comprehend, Oh’ in you I see the everlasting reign of my life and my love.
I take my pride of this day with a smile of hope and faith, That love in me someday will kindle a flame of warmth for you.