My weekend started beautifully with Prometheus wow.. Incredible movie that left about five questions in my mind. I may see it another time to figure out the technology that gone into making it. I really felt like a two hour movie went away in about 20 minutes. This is an action packed movie and Michael Fassbender’s performance as the robot is Oscar worthy. What is this movie’s connection to the Alien is a surprise I don’t want to give away. My favorite Charlize Theron should have had more to do in this movie, still she did a remarkable job in an anti-heroine role. This is a movie that should be seen on 3D as the 3D technology is well used in this. Hats off to the production designers for the amazing visualization we see in this movie.

  Saturday was not that crazy as I slept most of the daytime and evening my friend was at my home and we watched the Celtics-Heat game. As everyone was hating Heats and Lebron James I said “I am going to support these guys” and my support worked they won. Sunday… French Open and Euro Soccer… this I believe will tell you how much of a sports fan I am. Later on Sunday I watched True Blood Season premiere wow this season started with a bang, literally. This is going to be another heck of a season for True Blood.

  Now that I am back to work and I see most people are not on their seat. Many are on short vacations, some are sick and others I believe are lazy to get to work on this muggy Monday morning. I feel unusually quick this morning as I have finished some of the work requested really fast and now on a breather here. I am almost done with a new short story. The material I used in this one is really from a post by a friend and my response and her response to that and rest of it came from assumptions I made based on her silence. That’s me, if someone doesn’t communicate I will take that and put it into my imagination blender and see what comes out of it to write. On the flipside, one day her real boyfriend will find me and kick my ass that will be the end of many things and will give me new material to write.. The Beaten Dreams,.The Jealous Boyfriend, Her Violent Dance…etc, etc, etc… see I already have many things planned even for that unlikely event hehehehe. That’s me, I am not self boasting but it will be almost impossible to out think me and understand, everything I do have a reason beyond your imagination and everything I say have a meaning of its own and everything I write have a meaning bound by the thoughts and dreams of a simple human.

 

Her Image.

Into the mind many, many times whispered,
There is no love in her heart for you,
There is no love in her heart for you,
Mind boiled and bubbled love for her,
And into every corner of the body screamed,
To be the love of her,
To be the blessing for her,
To be the gladness of her,
To be the honor of her.

With the mind for reasons unknown want to disagree,
Then mind into the eye of the heart poured,
A million colors and painted her face,
Then my heart whispered into the material me,
Why try to be selfish? Be all mind want you to be.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved.2012

 

“Beautiful Girl In Autumn Park” by Sujin Jetkasettakorn

 

Recently I’ve been typecast into writing very personal experiences into poetry. Or at least personal experiences I thought may happen or may not happen. “I am a threat to my own romance.” That’s what I said about myself. What is the truth of love is something I honestly don’t know. There should be two people in love who should be synchronized and that is not the easiest task in this era, as love is a fashion item like a smart phone or glittering shoes. Still love is an incredible emotion. The intensity at times I feel in my yearning to be with the girl I love…hmmm it is good. Then I said.. “I can live a thousand years with this intensity and burning inside without ever seeing her in real than not love her for a second. It will be like a tornado hitting me on the head if I take my love off my heart” That’s it, what I said made me type this into computer. The reality of this is.. That girl may never read this post or poem. Even if she does…her reality may find it impossible to get synchronized with mine…. and of course history tells me I maybe destined to live the rest of my life alone.. Still …like I said earlier…“I can live a thousand years with this intensity and burning inside without ever seeing her in real than not love her for a second. It will be like a tornado hitting me on the head if I take my love off my heart.”

Enjoy.

Love Regained.

The air above the lake in even pace moved,
And the water below like a venom spitting serpent rolled,
The land like a lover in patience laid,
The storm has arrived every mind told.

The wanderer by the woods he stood,
As pines clashed in unknown vengeance,
Everything material in ear piercing thunders shook,
And the wind took an yellow rose and laid,
At the footstep of the aging wanderer.

Looking deep into the valley he stood,
As no storm nature blow can sway,
The mind of a man who feel none,
As every feeling in his mind focused,
Upon the eyes of the darling unseen.

Ah’ what wonders life at you can throw?
What wonders Mother Nature can show?
The seen and heard, the tasted and smelt,
Oh’ though not touched they all fragments of a reality,
Reality of a wonderful childhood dream,
When upon the terrace of a home a boy sat and dreamt,
About an unbelievable future he may never have.
The Earth at Sun stared and glowed,
The Moon stayed away as witness of that warmth,
As through dark matter universe moved,
That little boy too through time and space moved,
And Romance as the medium he took,
To see the unseen,
The hear the unheard,
The feel the unknown.

So all that known sways him not,
As the storm in fury lashed,
Lightning right beside him touched,
The ground shook with the fallen trees,
Even in the wild destruction all he found,
The beauty no one else cared to notice.

Horizons united and all around exploded,
The storm violently all around spread,
Every creature in fear all around ran,
With a smile the wanderer walked,
As mind far away with a pretty soul danced,
And through every bit of what Mother Nature unleashed enhanced,
The belief in the unseen,
Who in turn gave him the feelings of love for her,
That through every vein to every corner of him spread,
And the missing element his time and space found,
The joy of his love to every corner spread,
And a smile upon all that knows him sprouted,
As the love for her through his hand slipped, he regained.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved.2012

 

I Failed

This is a very busy week. It’s just that I don’t have a lot of time, the things I do are really contradictory. Monday evening helped my sister-in-law’s cousin to move to New Berlin, WI. Yesterday I went to see the Brewers game. Today I woke up at 4:30AM to be at work for an early morning meeting. Today evening going to help sister-in-law’s cousin to get the rest of the stuff to her new house, tomorrow is going to be another day like today. Then Friday at 7:00AM I should be at the Indian Consulate in Chicago. Come back in the evening as I don’t move a lot in Chicago for “interesting” reasons. then prepare for my sister-in-law’s cousin’s house warming which is at first light on Saturday morning that will be 4:00AM. Whew…. Long days and week ahead.

   Now how did this poem happen? Yesterday early morning onwards someone was hitting on my blog site and I was wondering who is it. I emailed one person who did such a thing long time back asking if she did that or not. But later I figured out it was some sort of bot on Xanga that does that. Well at least it brought back some old memories and I went through an interesting comment she once left on one my posts. She once left a comment on my site and I accidentally deleted that comment. I went to her blog and apologized for that. Here is what she said. “You have no need to be sorry at all. My one comment will be made up by all of the others that I post here, I promise that to you in return.
I must say, everyday that I come home from work, school, dance, etc, I always look forward to seeing your posts and comments…and I want to thank you. I am always honored to be your Mo Cushle, and will always be as such.” Sure she is still as such, even though, she grew up and once in a while scares me with some thoughts that come into her mind. Well, in fact we don’t’ communicate much these days at all. So, when I read that comment for some unknown reason the image that came to my mind was a small canoe moving through the water. With that in mind I wrote the following poem.

Dedicated to that wonderful Darling Girl.

The Unseen Dance.

 The canoe in the waves of lake swayed,
Like the heart that felt love of the one she loved,
Her girly ways kept her hidden,
The yearning through every corner of life screamed,
Deep in the mind a twitch she felt,
Ah’ the wonders of love, ageless stood,
Then step by step in the rhythm of his heartbeat danced.

The reddish skin by the late spring sun kissed,
The boat in steady pace moved,
The wind and water in sync took,
Her through the grooves of life she wished to feel.
But when every moment to the fullest she felt,
His heartbeat in dancing rhythm she felt,
And her love in the rhythm of his heartbeat danced.

Nothing in the universe stale stays,
Everything at speeds beyond imaginations move,
And we all along with them move,
One bright light motionless upon her stayed,
The light in a soul with love for her filled,
Though chaos of all kinds deep inside the source of that light brewed,
Every moment of remembrance of her melted the chaos,
And to make that light bright exploded,
Ah’ she moved all around in the guidance that light shown,
Unknowing the rays danced in the rhythm of her heartbeat.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM.All Rights Reserved.2012.

I would love to put the picture of the image of the girl in my head when I wrote this. But honestly I am very “Afraid” of the consequences of that action.

Enjoy if you can.

The Dancing Darling.

The rhythm of music deep from the heart played,
Words of a wonderful love poem through every vein moved,
Ah’ they both in every bit of thoughts untied,
Movement of hands and legs became the extension of those thoughts.

The true viewer in amazement watched,
The onlooker stood away in silence,
The critic with a smile on the face sat,
All the three united in me to enjoy a nice dance show.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved. 2012.

Photo “Silhouettes Of Couple Jumping“courtesy FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Friday ended in a happy note. I am always glad when I know a specific person read my blog or poem. I may not really write very pleasant things everyday, however I write with the thought, I cannot make everyone happy on every given day, still I am looking for ways in which I can make that one person smile every time that person visit my blog. Like I always say, I don’t keep anything in mind, when I say it out in my blog or during my show it is over and I move on. So I slept late on Friday and woke up a bit earlier than I expected on Saturday I looked around my house and like I said on Friday, it is a mess. I looked at it all and asked… “Isn’t your love life a bigger mess that this?” I laughed mockingly at myself and watched T.V almost all day until I fell asleep. I woke up at about 6:00PM and prepared for the show. The blogtv show with Ashley was awesome. Right when I was reading a fantastic poem she wrote we got featured and there we go more than 500 viewers and Ashley got all shy. It is not easy to talk to people who one doesn’t know. So it became like a T.V show from then on.

  My buddy texted me from Boston that he and his wife are coming to Milwaukee early morning on Sunday, I said “I will be there buddy” so I woke up early and went to airport and picked him up and dropped him at his home. Once I got back home, I started cleaning…. OMG it was a half a day job but I wiped the whole house clean with anti bacterial wipes. If anyone saw me cleaning up, it would have been the funniest thing to watch a short, hairy, big bellied guy in boxer shorts wearing facemask and rubber gloves cleaning up the place. Then I told myself ..”You are not that old”… hehehe I wish…But my back pain is gone now, that’s a relief. I slept a bit more and my buddy texted me. So I went to downtown and picked him and his wife and came to Bayshore. We ate dinner at the California Pizza Kitchen and they dropped me home and took my car and went to do some shopping. I came home and watched Game Of Thrones and Borgias.. That’s the weekend folks.

   To end this I had this thought.. in this world no matter what one achieves and no matter what is given to anyone, when one thought comes to mind, it truly burns inside, that thought is the one you love do not love you at all. For many, many years I am training in many ways to live with that burning but you know what, I am an epic fail in whatever method I tried.

Have a sweet, sweet week ahead.

Lone.

When looking at my “To Do” list, I see it will take couple of people to do all that I need to do. So I am leaving this earlier than expected. There were no blogs last week. I said I am cancelling all blogs and shows until I get settled with the “Dream Architect”.

  It will not be easy for anyone to really understand these days. Some try to interpret things through logic. Some try to interpret through astrology. Some just say they believe in science even though they no nothing about science. As for me I don’t belong to any of these groups. I am the “Lonely” Poet isn’t it? To be honest with you I sincerely believe there is more out there beyond our five senses can comprehend. So I’d say those that I can understand are all what I truly need.

   Now to a great extend I got petrified while trying to make a major change in my writing habits. Honestly it just did not work in the way I wanted it to work. To say in another way, the dream architect right now I have is an epic fail. To say openly, she is more interested in my private life than dealing with what I gave her. The responses were outrageous that tells me the previous one was an angel. It is hard very hard to make a change like that and for someone to play along. So it is bothering me in everything I do. My house is an incredible mess. I weigh 230lbs at 5 foot 6 inch height that is a little too much body weight and my back is paining. Nothing much happening at work (which is not really my fault as off shore developers were hired way ahead of time than needed), In Fact the positive things I hoped to happen did not happen at all. This is indeed the time when I need “all of my luck” .. hehehehe.. I will speak nothing more of it.

   I am preparing for a busy summer. I am pretty sure this is one summer I will have to do things worth remembering for lifetimes ahead.

I will do a blogtv show tomorrow as one of my very young friend emailed me saying “I miss you”. She is someone who once came to my show and I was about to kick her out saying she is too young to be in my show. She told her age in 2008 as 14 years old. Then she told me just co-host me. I did, and saw a pretty looking 14 year old with a baby. I asked “Is that your sister or brother you are holding” she said with a smile, “No, this is my baby” me and Pugli one of my friend from Finland were stunned. That girl was a rape victim. From that day onwards she was the only one in her age group allowed in my shows (until Laura came with her daughter Anna). She is the only one who knows my mobile phone number. Last time I talked to her was in 2009 when she called me and said she is moving. Yesterday when I saw one of her recording on blogtv, I saw she got another baby. That’s fantastic to see that she is doing fine after a catastrophe in her life. I said this here because, that is one girl who took life as it happened and lived with it, proving to the world as long as you are breathing there is chance for you to live life to the fullest.

   Then there is another girl who wants a line to be drawn in a shape she wants and me to dance over it. That’s another way of living. I respect her too however she chose silence (she is the only one who can command me to do a show anytime)  but I invite her to be in that show too if she is free and if she reads this before the show.

Expect nothing then you will know the sweetness of what you gained.

Enjoy this Friday.

 

When I bought my house I called it “Happiness Memorial” Many asked why would I use the word memorial and I said “I used the word monument when I said a greeting once and that monument makes me happy every time I think about that monument” what an evasive speech, later I thought as I hid the person in what I said. Those who heard it frowned but as they know it is not a good idea to confront me with their thoughts they all said nothing, even though I heard the echo from their mind that said “Whatever.” This poem was written with the “Darling Girl” in mind as everyday the monument is trying in all possible ways to fade away from my eyes.

Happiness Memorial.

 

“You the one who still may read.” She meant when she spoke,
Can’t even tell my name to address,
Hatred in her injected by serpents in protection around her crawl,
And they spit more venom as these days they won.

Time ahead none knows,
Time we passed we both know,
What in the past we cared in happiness bound,
Though in every corner of my mind a thought about her brings,
Happiness and cheerfulness I once for her wished,
This day my conscience bow in defeat, in her silent misunderstandings.

Never ever I will forgive all that became the reasons for the fall,
I leave her for her own cause,
But dear, always count on the stretched hands of mine.
If ever by the venom of those serpents you fall,
As the love of mine will be the anti-venom they can’t sustain,
Still looking at the raising sun in the morning I prayed,
Never ever to give a chance for the anti-venom to be used.

Such were the thoughts of mine when the morning spread,
Breathless, mother nature motionless stood,
When looking at the fading stars I once more prayed,
May this day make her the standing monument of happiness in the world.

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved. 2012.

Taking the word “Architect” from the movie Inception, I now call the model girl my dream architect. Like I said couple of days back there is a new girl. She is cute, hot and a brutally outspoken girl. Anyway we are not able to get any compatible chat at all because when I say water, she will say moon that’s what is going on now. But at least she is chatting hehehe. Now during the chatting one thing she asked again and again was what exactly I am looking for. I said this is more of a mind game than anything else. The problem is one will lose the difference of fantasy and reality altogether. That confused her big time. I still don’t know if this is the right girl and what I wrote below as a poem is derived out of the chat I had with the girl except the part I am saying about what is in my soul already. I hope someone will find it a bit interesting.

Have a sweet evening everyone.

To The New Dream Architect.

Grab me by my conscience; break the silence of my soul,
Build the castle, in which we can roam,
Like silly love birds, singing and filling hearts with love.

Take the words of mine from the scattered thoughts of mine,
Like a goldsmith takes the dusts of gold,
Merge in your emotions and in your soul melt,
And pour it upon the soul of mine.

But careful in every action and words you should be,
For in my soul you will see prints of another soul, engraved,
Whose image you will never see,
Whose voice you will never hear,
Never bother her even with your thoughts,
As nothing ever from my soul will unbind,
Those thoughts, laughs and disappointments we shared,
But lost all in the tears we shed,
When times through lives played an uncouth dance,
And we fell apart with a generation standing in between.

Never give me the pain of waiting,
Never fail to ask a question in mind,
Fear not about the intentions of mine,
For in purity cast are my thoughts,
And purer than the tears of a newborn are my intentions.

About my love and relationship never you should ask,
For there exists a girl with all pure intentions I looked,
The crazy world, the crooked world Oh and me in it all,
Made her leave a mark in my soul,
A mark that will make me feel,
Her in my soul forever and forever,
Never will I let another soul love mine,
For a criminal I will become in faking the love of mine.

Writer I am and none else I am,
Stories and poems of mine are all you should care,
The poet is a reason for lighting a flame in reader’s soul,
What burns in there the poet can’t control,
Know that well when you leave a smiling image for me.
 

©RIAZAHAMMED.COM. All Rights Reserved-2012.